5 April Fool’s Day Jokes NOT to Play on Your Date

It's over! -Photo by JR

April Fool’s is by far one of the best holidays in the world!!!  Make sure you have fun when you prank, and follow these helpful hints:

1. Don’t mess up your date or long-term relationship by fake breaking up with him or her on April Fool’s Day.  And if you really MUST end a relationship, I suggest you do it on March 31st or April 2nd just so there is no confusion or misguided hope.

2. Don’t tell your date that you are sick or have been in an accident when you haven’t.  That’s just cruel.

3. If you don’t want incessant questions that will last the rest of your life or the rest of your relationship (whichever ends first), it isn’t a good idea to tell your date that s/he is fat.

4. You never want to tell your date that you are pregnant even if you are a dude because, as we saw on Oprah, even dudes can get pregnant.  This just plays with fate.

5. Lastly, you don’t want to have someone else tell your date that you are dead.  It’s kinda a mood killer.

 

 

 

 

Leave a Comment April 1, 2014

Where Did Our Confidence Go?

Don't hide your feelings! -Photo by JR

I don’t remember this, but my parents always tell me a story about when I was three.  We were in a store and someone came over to us and said, “You’re a pretty little girl,” and I very definitively responded, “I know.”  After that experience, I learned to say thank you when people complimented me.  As I grew older, I began to realize that I had not been a very pretty little girl, and I don’t think I was anything to look at as a teenager or woman either. Unfortunately, I’m not alone in this transition.  Far too many of my awesome friends don’t think they are all that awesome.  It always baffles me when some of my most intelligent, funny, creative, and attractive friends ask me for dating advice.  It baffles me even more when they throw in a self-deprecating line about something that they feel makes them less than worthy…. of what?  Of a date?  With another imperfect animal known as a human?

Put yourself out there! -Photo by JR

We were all adorable little kids with big dreams, and too many of us grew up to believe we lost or never had any beauty or talent or interesting thing about us.  We can blame the fashion industry (a size 0 was too big, so they made 00).  We can blame the economy (we’d have jobs if one of the 1000′s of places we’ve applied would just, you know, HIRE us).  We can blame social media (you mean we never have to tell people how we really feel face to face or even MEET them?!?!).  We can blame the people we call friends (if s/he doesn’t like it, it must not be worth a darn thing!).  In the end, we have to get past our lagging self-esteem and muster up the confidence to put ourselves out there and put our hearts on the line.

It's time to put your heart on the line. -Photo by JR.

Here are 10 things to remember:

1. Your parents were right, but so were everyone else’s.  You are all beautiful, smart, witty, humourous, talented, creative, and worthy of everlasting love.

2. We are all embarrassed by something, but when we are with the right people, they will love us anyway.  Our friends do, so why should anyone else be any different?

3. Once people are in their 20′s, they usually can handle being liked without getting weirded out by it.  This means, if the other person isn’t interested, it probably won’t affect the friendship/co-worker relationship/Candy Crush Saga game.

4. Do NOT be a creeper.  This is particularly important if you are pursuing a stranger.   Do not stare.  Do not follow.  By all means, buy that hottie at the bar a drink.  Give him/her your number.  Ask him/her on a date.  Just whatever you do, do NOT come on too strong.  You want a date.  You can’t possibly know if you want marriage yet.

5.  If you are interested in someone, you have two options.  You can express an interest, or you can keep your mouth shut.  It is really simple: If you don’t share your feelings you don’t have a chance unless the other person does something instead.  It isn’t time efficient.  If you open your mouth, you will get your answer.  The sooner you have your answer, the sooner you can either develop your relationship or move onto the next one.

Open up your mouth!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Leave a Comment April 1, 2014

Killing the Dead Silence: Conversations to Have on Dates or with Anyone

Silence scares me. Perhaps it’s because I have nerve-deafness in my left ear, and I always wonder when or if going to too many concerts as a teenager is going to do me in, but I’m probably really scared of silence because I’m a highly energized person with a lot of nervous energy. I prefer to ask questions and force the other person to talk, but if the other person isn’t speaking enough, then I need to chime in and ramble. I can’t say that people are always interested in what I have asked or have said, but I can tell you they always responded, and that silent moment never loomed over a date.

Recently my friend was complaining because a couple guys were interested in her, but all they would message her was “Hi.” or “Hey.” I was thinking about how they could have improved their opening. They could have said something like, “Hi. You’re really interesting because…” Or “Hey. Some weather we’ve been having, right?” Neither of those would be particularly telling, but they might help develop into a more in-depth conversation.

Then I thought about how many people there are in the world and how little time we’d have to get to know all of the people in the world if we continued to waste time on all the wrong people for us. Let’s be real. If you meet someone online, you hopefully spend a couple weeks or so getting to know that person online before you even bother meeting, let alone get that stranger’s last name. You probably go on one or two dates where you try to figure out if the person is a Stranger-Danger before you decide if you’d even like to continue dating the person, and by that point, how many weeks have passed without knowing if you are even compatible?

People have come up with a lot of taboos for first dates, but I’m going to give you the number one taboo in any situation, ANY situation: The only taboo is wasting time.

Conversations to Have on Dates or with Anyone:

*Do you snore?

*What do you find funny?

*Do you have any allergies?

*Do you have any pets? If not, do you want any pets?

*What do you think about the possibility of peace in the Middle East?

*What is/was your favourite subject in school? Best subject? Worst subject?

*Where are you from?

*What schools did you attend?

*What is the strangest thing you’ve ever done?

*How much time do you spend exercising per week?

*What do/don’t you eat?

*What is the coolest thing you’ve ever done?

*Do you believe in a higher power?

*Will you date someone whose religious or lack of religious beliefs differ from yours?

*What are your thoughts on abortion?

*What political ideology do you favor?

*What is your favorite type of music?

*What do you think about animal testing?

*Have you ever been abducted by aliens? (Trust me. You should get this question over with early.)

*Are you a left-handed or right-handed?

*What is your sign? Are we astrologically compatible? Does that matter to you?

*Who is/was your favourite world leader?

*What is your opinion of the media?

*Do you watch TV? If so, what are your favourite programmes?

*What is one toy you always wanted but never received?

*Do you celebrate holidays and birthdays? If so, how do you celebrate them?

*What was your most embarrassing moment?

*Do you like sports? Do you play any sports? Do you watch any sports?

*What is a typical week like for you?

*What is your work schedule? (If you have opposing schedules, you might as well learn that early.)

*Have you ever been in love? If so, what happened?

*If you were any animal, what would you be? Why?

*Are you prejudiced?

*How do you feel about equality?

*What do you think about alternative forms of energy?

*Where do you hang out?

*How would you/how do you discipline your kids?

*Do you use/have you ever tried drugs?

*Do you drink?

*Do you smoke anything?

*What are some things that you’ve always wanted to do?

*Do you like museums?

*Do you like art/literature/poetry/music/theatre/comedy/movies? Favourites?

*What person had the most profound impact on your life?

*Who is/are your best friend(s)?

*Are you close to your family? Why or why not?

*Do you travel? If so, where have you been? If not, are there places you’d like to go? If not, what are your reasons for staying close to home?

*What do you think about healthcare? Education? The economy? Immigration? The Occupy movement? The environment? Gun control? Hedonism? Monogamy? Blood diamonds? Hipsters? Labels? Yoga? Bagpipes? The Cowboys? Authority? The police? Unions? Politics within music? A woman president? Corporate America? Monopolies? The free market? Musicals? The beach? The mountains? The outdoors? Photography? Costumes? Uniforms? Snow days? Pumpkin patches? Cars, trains, planes, boats, bicycles, motorcycles, mopeds, scooters, skateboards, etc.? Graffiti? Litter? Secret societies? Dancing?

*Do you ever dance?

*Do you sing in the car and/or shower?

*What are you looking for?

*What is a deal breaker?

*What is one thing that you wish I knew about you?

Leave a Comment March 31, 2014

Cross-Country Skiing

Relationships take work.  So does cross-country skiing.  If you’re athletic and up for the challenge, power your way through snow on cross-country skis.  You’ll have plenty of time for cool conversations (literally) while getting an intense workout.  Warning: This is NOT for everyone.  Know your athletic ability and tolerance level for both cold weather and trails that MAY be difficult to follow.

 

 

Leave a Comment February 21, 2013

Make Every Beautiful Day Remind You of the One You Love

Love Tip:

Be Pavlov.  On the most beautiful days, spend time outdoors with the one you love (or the person you are interested in).  Eventually that person will associate every gorgeous day with you.  What better compliment than to be remembered with the  beauty of the world!

Leave a Comment February 20, 2013

LONG d i s t a n c e r e l a t i o n s h i p s

  • A friend asked a question about long distance relationships, and that has prompted me to write on this issue.
    I’ve only done the long distance thing once.  Well, twice, if you count a summer “love” from when I was 14.  We met at a dance in Stone Harbor, NJ.  We left the dance and walked on the beach.  We shared a very innocent kiss on the lips.  We became pen pals for several months until it dwindled.  I have no romantic regrets, but I wish I had kept in contact with him.  You can never have too many friends.
    The time I really had a long distance relationship was when I was 24 years old.  I had already dated my boyfriend at the time for two years, and I spent part of one summer studying abroad for grad school.  It was a short period of time, but he paid to have international service and called me a few mornings a week before my class, which was crazy late for him and crazy early for me.  The amount of time I had been away did not affect us too much.  If we had just entered into the relationship, I think it would have been more problematic.  So perhaps I’m not the best person to discuss this topic, but bear with me.
    People CAN and DO have healthy long distance relationships.  People in the military may have spouses at home for years on end. It doesn’t mean their relationship is any weaker. If someone moves out of state for whatever reason, there is always Skype, e-mail, texts, calls, snail mail, Facebook, Twitter, etc. You can keep in touch regularly and make your in-person meetings that much more meaningful.  The positive aspects are clear.  Everyday aggravations are at a minimum.  When you talk, you have less time to nag each other about cooking and cleaning or the way one of you looked at that waiter or waitress last night and more time to talk about the important aspects of your day. Plus, your significant other might actually LISTEN to you when you say what that awful coworker or boss said to you; however, the negatives can be twofold. 1. The second you are both living in the same town again (presuming that at some point, maybe even a decade later, you will live nearby or together), the annoyances could be difficult to adjust to. When you see someone often, you know what bugs you about the other person and you are reminded that you can take those aspects with the good ones. Without seeing the person often, you forget the annoyances and might end up thinking the other person changed for the worse when you do finally see them constantly. (I never remember him biting his fingers!  I don’t recall her cursing during every sporting event on the TV!  Did s/he really put the toilet paper roll on facing THAT way?  Why does he need to fall asleep to TALK RADIO?)
    The other negative aspect is that any attention CAN BE  good attention. This means that it can be healthy to be annoyed at each other.  Perhaps that will help if you are able to be reunited on a regular basis.  It can sometimes be detrimental if you are not reunited though.  Being able to suffer through the perils of a relationship reminds us that we are human. When your friends are complaining about their partners’ snoring, you might not have anything to complain about.  It may remind you that you’re not with the one you love and you might start wanting someone who can fulfill a connection in person and in real time.  It might make you pay closer attention to the people around you who ARE giving you attention.  Be cautious.  It’s good to have friends, but don’t give yourself or your partner the opportunity to become closer with to someone else.  I know several long distance relationships that have broken up this way.
    Like any relationship, if you want it to work, make sure you really, truly work at it.  Nothing will ever work unless you let the other person into your life.  Don’t give up on each other by saying, s/he won’t understand because s/he’s not here.  One of my best friends lives far away from me, and I have always felt like I’ve known every person in her life from her next door neighbors to her mail carrier.  Good communication goes a long way.  Talk about the little, the big, the good, the bad, the ugly, and the utterly ridiculous.  Long distance relationships can work as well as any other relationship if you both love each other and try enough.
    Love is a conversation that continues even after you’ve said good night.

 

Leave a Comment February 19, 2013

FACEBOOK OFFICIAL

If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, it probably DID make a sound.   However, if I were a tree falling down after 500 years of offering shade and shelter for animals, I would HOPE that EVERYONE  would hear me go.  If I were in a relationship with a great guy after years of being single, I’d want to tell everyone!  I’d want to wear my heart on my sleeve, face, and, well, Facebook!

Making a relationship Facebook Official can be a dilemma.  While some may be willing to share their relationship status with over 900 of their “closest” friends from pre-K through last night, others may want to keep the relationship privy to the people they confide in the most.  Being a fan of the first scenario, it is hard for me to rectify the difference between being a dirty little secret and being in a special romance that doesn’t need online Likes.  I don’t necessarily need the attention, but I want to feel that my relationship is WORTHY of others knowing about it.

Billy Joel says, “It’s a matter of trust.”  You can trust that someone who is in a relationship with you will be faithful and honest, but you can also trust that your friends would tell you if they were in relationships.  If you’re hiding that special relationship, what else might you be hiding?  Why aren’t you willing to share your status with your Facebook friends?  Is it because you don’t want that cute ex of yours to suddenly realize you’re not available?  Is it because you’re ashamed of the person you’re dating?

These are all legitimate questions.  People may debate me and say they don’t want their family members to start asking questions or have to deal with people seeing that they are suddenly IN a relationship and suddenly OUT of it if it doesn’t work.  To those on the other side, I question your feelings.  Just how interested are you if you aren’t willing to deal with outside opinions.  Perhaps if it is not worth the risk of sharing it publicly, it might not be worth acting on it privately.

And that, my friends, is my Facebook Official opinion.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Leave a Comment July 24, 2012

Time to get cold feet!

Blue Cross RiverRink is a great place to spend date night!  Hold hands and skate under the stars and beside the picturesque Delaware River while listening to music! riverrink.com

Leave a Comment December 1, 2011

It’s All Downhill from Here

Skiing is a great date for the adventurous!  Whether you’re whisking down a bunny hill or rising in midair on the terrain park, if all goes well, the adrenaline rush won’t be just because you did your first double diamond.   Ski lifts were made so you could get a little closer to your partner. (Otherwise, they would have used trains.)  Snow glistens like clean and clear crystals as you glide gently above the wintry paradise, snuggling with your date, cold noses bumping as you sensually snog.  If you get to the bottom of the hill and you can’t get enough lip action, just grab the closest chairs to the fireplace in the lodge or go back to the cabin.

The Poconos has a variety of ski places.

Check out: Bear Creek http://bcmountainresort.com/winter/winter_terrainpark.aspx

Blue Mountain   http://www.skibluemt.com/

and Jack Frost & Big Boulder  http://www.jfbb.com/

Jack Frost and Big Boulder have some excellent lodging facilities perfect for your date or group outing.

Leave a Comment November 1, 2011

Philadelphia Has History, And You Can Make Some Part III

I’m madly in love with Robert Langdon, but you don’t have to be. In fact, I don’t want the competition.  Here’s a date that will appeal to author Dan Brown fans, history buffs, and architecture addicts alike. The Grand Lodge of the Free and Accepted Masons of Pennsylvania is located in Philadelphia.  They don’t call this gorgeous structure grand without reason, but don’t take my word.  Take the tour.  Check out pagrandlodge.org.


1 Comment May 30, 2011

DimpleDate.com is a site dedicated to bringing you dating options beyond the chain restaurant and Hollywood blockbuster.
;-)

Carpe Diem,

Jeannette Ryder,
Owner and Author of DimpleDate.com